Bug Repelling Breakthrough!

Sun Sorbs

By Tracy Lawrence

You may be familiar with the known benefits of our popular Sun Sorbs?  Like “Unique patented molecular structure attracts & absorbs oils.“ And, “Sun Sorb absorbs up to 40 times its weight in body oils and suntan lotions and also attracts pollen.” And, “Improves filtration.” We are happy to report that they work: they deliver each and every promise…

…and more?!

Recently, it has come to our attention, that the Sun Sorb repels bugs!

[crickets]

Alright, alright….We realize repelling bugs may be a stretch.  But before you write this claim off as nonsense, or some ploy to get rich from a $5.99, chemical free product,  here is what we have witnessed:

In addition to all the amazing things it has been proven to do, the Sun Sorb acts as a life raft for insects, allowing them to escape drowning,  dry out, and fly away.

 [The song, “Born Free” plays softly in the distance] 

We know what you’re thinking.  How does saving bugs repel them? Trust me, I’m getting there.

It is our theory that the 6 legged survivors not only go on to live full lives, they make it their mission to go out and share their near death experience with their families, friends, and other insects; they educate all bugs on pool dangers – leaving you with a bug free pool environment! And if this isn’t enough, just think of the time saved scooping their little corpses from your circulating pool. 

We are still in the beginning phases of research and data collection to prove….

[a lightbulb appears over her head]

Hey!  why not contribute to our study and join our focus group of Sun Sorb customers!?  You can be part of this scientific discovery.  Your job, as part of our focus group,  will be to slather yourself in sunscreen, grab your bug viewing goggles and park yourself on a raft to observe your Sun Sorb bug repellant in action.  Did you see insects crawl on, escape drowning and fly away?  Did you hear them tell their friends?  Did you notice a decrease in creepy crawlers around your pool?  Did you save time manning your net? Do this all season (that is how long your Sun Sorb will last) then report back to us with your findings! 

Even if we don’t find adequate proof of these claims, your time will not be wasted as you reap the benefits of your Sun Sorb, like “stopping the formation of a scum line,” “prolonging your filter life,” all while doing your part in a scientific breakthrough to better the lives of future generations of pool owners and swimmers everywhere! 

Now get out there and enjoy that pool!

Previous Next